Procrastination

I am a serial procrastinator...I have been one since I can remember. I have always done homework, studied, presentations, lesson plans, yard work, Christmas shopping, Birthday shopping, and anything else. I have an uncanny ability to compartmentalize everything, I can remember being stressed out but it always seemed to work out fine. I graduated with a 3.36 GPA and I can remember sitting in my chair the day of graduation thinking: shit, if I hadn't procrastinated my way through college I could have had a 4.0. I was always ok with doing decent and I was never a perfectionist. I was ok with typing a paper the night before it was due, not proof reading it and turning it in to get a 90% or a 95% instead of a 100% if I had started earlier or proof read it. I don't know why I do this-possibly because:
 school has always been decently easy for me?

• Or it was less stressful to go through school and life that way?
•  Maybe because I liked talking to my boyfriend or hanging out with friends more than studying and I did ok without it, so why not?
•  Or because I worked on weekends and some nights so I was busy and I could reason my way out of starting things early, always saying I would start it tomorrow?
• Maybe because it always worked out ok-it never backfired on me (knock on wood)-it always turned out either ok or great?

This seems like gloating, or being big-headed (I do have an abnormally large head-physically), but i'm not. It's the way I have always functioned. School lessons could have been spectacular, but instead of spending hours and hours at night on them I chose to do them at school in the morning and make them efficient and to the point...because I was tired (probably because I was lugging an extra 100 pounds around all day...). I am not proud of it but I am still a great teacher-but I think every day how much better I could be. I get ideas about changing lesson plans and looking up research and doing this and that for my classes...but what do I do? I procrastinate....I put it off because I can do it later, and I have taken care of two kids all day so I deserve time to relax....I make an excuse.

Right there it is!! I MAKE AN EXCUSE and that is why I think losing weight is going to be so difficult. I have been procrastinating for years about losing the weight! YEARS. Because I don't HAVE to do it now. There is no deadline, no reason I have to do it...I WANT to do it...but I do not HAVE to do it....that I think is the key and my problem. I don't know how to get around it...but I have been thinking about it constantly for about five days...I am formulating a plan, and right now taking everything a day at a time. Maybe I need to change my eating habits and the entire way I approach life.

That's it for now...I hope everyone has a great night, keep your chin up. Here is a quote to end with:

"Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice." -Wayne Dyer